Actually, I lied. She's nothing I'd want to fuck, nor is there legitimate contempt for her peter heater. She's raisawetsx - gifter of original content and cervical prize fighter. Moral of the story: Never underestimate a Russian's pain threshold.
FORNICATION: It's pretty basic stuff. But for Goober McAutismo over here it might as well be mission impossible. What you're about to see may quite possibly be the worst excuse for sexual entertainment that's ever made it online... and that's coming from someone who sat through all 74 minutes of Edward Penishands. Twice. [MORE CAMS]
Mishka here just signed the liability waiver to star in her very own movie! So grab a bottle of vodka and put down a preemptive puke bucket beside couch because it's time for some classic Russian pornography! YAY! [FULL SCENE] [SONG]
In Russia, a fake farm equipped with disco lights and some thot lip syncing catchy dance music while fucking for 20 minutes is quality porn. I'm not totally convinced, but the song does have a 'pavlov's dog' effect on my boner now. Moar HERE.
Congratz! Local Russian folklore states that if you are visited by the naked battle gypsy of St. Pete you will be forever blessed by good fortune. Don't look directly at her vagina though, or they say she'll curse you with impotence.
There was a Russian potter, that had a Russian daughter, that one day fucked Rocco and told him about her father. The Russian man, who was a Rocco Fan, was never more proud of his daughter. Full Scene HERE.
What does a Toyota Supra, lung cancer and a washer machine have in common? In most cases, absolutely fucking nothing. But this isn't like most cases. This is Czech pornography, the final frontier in sexual retardation. Download here and discuss here.
Compliments aren't my strong point, but I must say... chick in the yellow dress is fucking stunning. I'd readily eat Honey Nut Cherrios out of Philip Seymour Hoffman's crusty asshole just for a chance to hold her hand. Someone Russian please hook it up. FULL VIDEO HERE.
What's life's greatest mystery? god? aliens? why Lionsgate allows Tyler Perry to continue directing films? How about how the fuck this 46 year old poster boy for NAMBLA managed to pull a Russian model half his age, only to vow abstinence for half a fucking decade? Full video HERE and more HERE.
Russian bitch spazzes the fuck out for no apparent reason and then tries to claim she was just "acting". Yep... no better way to enhance a porn scene than by acting like a demonic crackwhore with Tourette syndrome. Download the full video HERE.
This is from a Russian film called Philosophy Of A Knife. It's about the Japanese Unit 731... the one that pretty much spent a decade coming up with ridiculous ways to kill people. It's basically just 4 hours of torture. Fun fun fun. While we're on the subject, I'm in preproduction on a post-apocalyptic thriller about punk rock necrophiliacs. Really could use some female talent. Hit me up!